A bit of a quiet day for Canada unless drug-testing is now an Olympic sport! It seems that Canada is being targeted for excessive drug-testing. It seems it’s becoming a common misconception that everyone in Canada smokes crack! It’s sad that crackaletes like Rob Ford make it look so acceptable. Hey Olympic committee, it’s only the Toronto sortof-mayor, OK? But just to be safe, don’t check the snowboarders bags.
On the brighter side, the shiny like silver side that is, Canada picks up another medal. Canada earned a silver medal in team figure skating. Kaetlyn Osmond, Patrick Chan, Kevin Reynolds, Meagan Duhamel, Eric Radford, Kirsten Moore-Towers, Dylan Moscovitch, Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir won silver medals in the new Team Figure Skating competition but if the rumours are true about corrupt judges from Russia and the U.S. they might get an upgrade…aw, who am I kidding the judges are always suspect and nothing ever comes of it and besides, that little Russian kid was pretty awesome!
How could we not participate in the celebration that is Rob Ford? Click the pic to order it now!
CCTXM015 Not only does Toronto Mayor Rob Ford smoke crack, he even once made a cameo appearance in the National Ballet of Canada’s “The Nutcracker” on December 10, 2011. Ford appeared as a bellicose Cannon Doll although some reports suggest that he may have been on one of his “drunken stupors” and mistook the cannon as a giant crack-pipe. Toronto, Ontario 2011.
From crack to rocks…
CCTXM014 A Curling party in Swansea, Ontario (now part of Toronto) December 25, 1904.
CCTXM017 Sir Henry and Lady Mary Pellatt set out by horse-drawn carriage Toronto, Ontario c1913.
CCTXM018 Toboggan enthusiasts line up for the High Park toboggan runs. Toronto, Ontario c1915.
…And let’s keep Santa as far from Mr. Ford as we can.
Thousands of people swarm the streets, walk along beside and sit perched on ledges to watch the floats of the Eaton’s Santa Claus Parade. The parade wound through the streets of Toronto, ending at the Eaton’s James Street entrance where Santa would climb out of his sleigh and up onto the entrance awning to address the crowd. Toronto, Ontario November 15, 1930.
Hey everyone, here’s the latest from the Canadian Culture Thing postcard line…
CCT0115 – This photo was provided by the possessor of the alleged “Crack Video” that shows Toronto Mayor Rob Ford smoking crack in early 2013. Other than three corroborating reported viewings by twoToronto Star reporters and one from Gawker, the video has not yet surfaced. Though this photo is not taken from the video, it was allegedly taken during another “Ford crack run” and has become the symbolic image of the video
CCT0116 – Cover of “Sport Fishing in British Columbia” booklet 1953. / Couverture de livret “pêche de sport en B.C.” 1953.
CCT0117 – Concert poster for the Beatles at Maple Leaf Gardens on August 17, 1966. Having performed in Canada in 1964 and 1965, this would be their last concert in Canada. / Concertez l’affiche pour le Beatles aux jardins de feuille d’érable le 17 août 1966. L’exécution au Canada en 1964 et 1965, ceci serait leur dernier concert au Canada.
CCT0118 – Former Prime Minister Jean Chrétien moves an anti-poverty protester out of his way in Hull, Quebec on Feb. 15, 1996. The Prime Minister’s chokehold became known as the Shawinigan Handshake after his home town. / L’ancien premier ministre Jean Chrétien déplace un protestataire combattant la pauvreté hors de sa voie dans la coque, Québec le 15 février 1996. Le chokehold du premier ministre est devenu notoire comme prise de contact de Shawinigan après sa ville natale.
CCT0119 – Northwest Mounties #2 comic book cover 1948.
CCT0120 – Animated Map of Canada c1953.
CCT0121 – The official Canadian Ensign Flag with the British Union Jack flag…and a beaver. c1934. / L’indicateur Canadien officiel d’insigne avec l’indicateur britannique d’Union Jack… et un castor. c1934.
Cover of Girls’ Friend Library Featuring The Shamed Wife, a compelling Novel of Canadian Life and Love. No. 387 May 4, 1933.
CCT0123 – Cover of Dominion of Canada Animated Atlas c1920. Newfoundland would not join Canada until 1949. / La couverture du dominion du Canada a animé l’atlas c1920. Newfoundland ne joindrait pas le Canada jusqu’en 1949.
CCT0124 – Looking east along College Street toward Spadina Avenue, Toronto, Ontario c1908. / Regard est le long de la rue d’université vers l’avenue de Spadina Toronto, Ontario c1908.
CCT0125 – Looking south down Yonge Street toward Shuter Street Toronto, Ontario c1915. / Regard de la rue de Yonge de sud vers le bas vers la rue Toronto de Shuter, Ontario c1915.
CCT0126 – Looking east along Queen Street West toward at Macdonell Street Toronto, Ontario c1900. / Regarder est le long de la rue de la Reine occidentale vers la rue de Macdonell Toronto,Ontario c1900.
Looking northwest toward College Street Baptist Church (built 1889) at College Street and Palmerston Boulevard (formerly Muter Street) Toronto, Ontario c1909. / Regarder du nord-ouest vers l’église baptiste de rue College (construite 1889) la rue College et le boulevard de Palmerston (autrefois rue de Muter) Toronto,Ontario c1909.
Recently, I witnessed a true example of Canadian patience and diplomacy. I don’t know much about Councillor Josh Matlow but I sure know this: he knows how to keep it together. In a debate with the current Toronto Super-Mayor Rob “Subway” Ford over a subway extension, Ford argued staunchly that subways were way better than LRTs. As the debate progressed, Councillor Matlow began an investigation into whether Ford even knew what an LRT was.
Using his best Columbo skills, he managed to discover nothing. Because his mic was turned off and, like a noble manatee, Ford managed to swim back and forth away from the question. Ford did vaguely utter that an LRT was a Streetcar line like the St.Clair right-of-way. But while he never once acknowledged that he didn’t actually know what an LRT was, he did prove one thing: Josh Matlow could keep his cool and refrained from running across the room and choke Rob “Bike Lane” Ford!
When the dust cleared, city council voted 28 – 16 in favour of the subway extension. I am confident that Doug Ford has explained to little brother what an LRT is by now so now he will be able to answer Josh Matlow confidently that and LRT is not like St.Clair, it is like Queen Street.
Here are some situations where politicians could have used some of Councillor Josh Matlow’s reserve.
Indian Parliament…
…And Jordan…
…And while this one in the States might not involve politicians, it’s still over a very important issue – Maple Syrup…
Trinity College grounds looking south towards gates at Queen Street West and Strachan Avenue. Toronto, Ontario, October 9, 1913.
I attended Art in the Park this weekend at Trinity-Bellwoods Park. Our local super-park and one-time home of Trinity College (1851-1925), was overrun by artists and art-lover’s in this annual exhibition and sale.
Trinity College gates, Queen Street West at Strachan Avenue. Toronto, Ontario, Canada c1916.
The sun was shining, children were laughing, lover’s were canoodling (that’s right, canoodling!), I had a bowl of dumplings and it seemed that everything was right with the world. But looking past the veneer of paradise, past the squirrels, black and white, gathering nuts in unity, there was subversion afoot! Not since 2001, when Mel Lastman shook hands with members of the Hell’s Angels Motorcycle Club in an unfortunate photo-opt, has something so scandalous taken place in Toronto politics. Mel Lastman claimed to not know who was shaking his hand, and when told he was shocked to discover that there was a chance that the friendly hand-shaking bikers might be mixed up in illegal shenanigans (that’s right shenanigans – don’t judge me!) like drug-trafficking!
Mel Lastman shakes hand with member of the Hell’s Angel in January of 2001.
But here in Trinity-Bellwoods Park where I once saw a cat leap from the top of a tree, over the head of a reaching fire-fighter on a ladder-truck, something more shocking and unbelievable had taken place and was now on display.
Kids, cover your eyes…
While you can’t actually see the cat in the picture, believe you me, when that cat hit the ground it was well enough to run.
Allegedly, Rob Ford (Toronto’s temporary mayor) had been seen standing next to Sasquatch on the shores of Toronto Island. Artist Mike Riley had captured the event and was now displaying it for everyone to see.
“Look, isn’t that the CN Tower” by Mike Riley
Rob Ford has been known to be staunchly opposed to Gravy Trains, weekly weigh-ins and so horrified by Gay Pride that he doesn’t even want to be in the city in case he might catch homosexuality, but when graffiti artists began depicting him in an unsavoury light, Big Rob went after them.
Graffiti by Ivus
Is it possible that now that his impromptu appearance next to Sasquatch Dave is out there for the whole city to ridicule that Rob Ford may go after art in general?
Rob Ford targets art! First it was Gravy Trains, then it was weigh-ins, next it was safely operating a motor vehicle. Now he’s adding eyebrows!
Sasquatch Eddie, who was visiting from the Fraser Valley in B.C. has been facing ridicule amongst his fellow-Sasquatch at home. In a front-page story in the local Sasquatch Valley Recorder, the Sasquatch community is in an uproar about Sasquatch Dave posing alongside Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, claiming it was poor judgement on his part. In an interview with Canadian Culture Thing, Sasquatch Dave claims he was simply making a silly pose for a photo for long-time girlfriend Sasquatch Velma and he “was just as shocked as everyone else that the Toronto Mayor jumped into the frame.”
Sasquatch Dave added that he has been having trouble sleeping ever since and has been having a recurring dream, “I’m in a large pot of boiling water and there a Rob Fords dancing around it and chanting that I have to “volunteer” for his Toronto football team or I can kiss my job goodbye! It’s horrible…just horrible.”
Let me tell you, you haven’t seen sad until you’ve seen a Sasquatch cry.
Toronto-based artist Olenka Kleban’s butter sculpture depicting the mayor driving a car while reading a Margaret Atwood novel was a real crowd-pleaser at the CNE this year. Rob never wanted to lick himself so badly.
