Category Archives: Entertainment

No, this isn’t Family Guy – It’s the Rob Ford Crack Video

With Doug Ford shame looming in the near future, let’s take a moment and remember the funner brother. It will be more likely that Doug will punch a blind woman in the face before smoking crack but hey, never say never! Ontario has a really awkward decision to make: Is it time for the return of the United Farmers of Ontario?

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In Canada, Even Our Beavers are Polite

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Trudeau was prepared to shake the Trump.

Donald Trump learned the meaning of the word Strong in True, North, Strong and Free at the hands of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau when they met in Washington yesterday. Donald Trump’s handshake technique, meant to show his dominance by pulling his co-shakee off balance, failed to achieve its goal with our masterful Mr. Trudeau. Trudeau was prepared for this tactic and met the Donald as the master in each of hisĀ attempts.

This was good but I think it would have been funnier if the taller Justin had offered a high-five. Donald Trump would have been there, red-faced and jumping with his little hand flailing in the air trying to make contact. Oh, good times.

I hope they don’t declare war on us now.

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Yoga Hosers: Mr. Smith Goes to Canada.

yogahosers-harleyquinnsmith-lilyrosedepp Here’s a favour to everyone. Watch this trailer and feel like you’ve now seen it without having to endure the entire film. This diaper load from writer-director Kevin Smith might be less offensive than Argo because it doesn’t spoof Canadian heroes, just hosers, but that’s not saying much. Like many films of the deep dark past when white actors played non-white characters, this one pours the American-style beet-sugar, fake maple syrup all over it’s cinematic trojan horse.

Years ago, it was very common for actors like Christopher Lee to play Fu Manchu or Laurence Olivier to play Othello in black-face but there are Canadian actors all over the place! Hollywood is filthy with them, not to mention Canada, where you filmed this. Under closer scrutiny CCT found that not only are the leads not Canadian, there isn’t one Canadian in the cast – not one. What?

cct-mickeyrooneybatThe two young stars unknowingly I’m sure, play roles that nod to the historic racism of Hollywood. Kevin Smith’s daughter Harley Quinn Smith is to Yoga Hosers what Mickey Rooney was to Breakfast at Tiffany’s and for Lily-Rose, I’ll dig into the distant familial past to her father Johnny Depp’s horrific portrayal of Lone Ranger’s partner, Tonto. Lily-Rose Depp’s role as a hapless Canadian teen at least hasn’t completely deconstructed a beloved icon.

the-lone-ranger-johnny-depp-armie-hammerCome on, Mr. Smith, no one needs your Canadian Trilogy. Canadians are masters of comedy and need to be revered as such. This film is too absurd to explain and a viewing of the trailer should be enough.

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